'Foreign City Bues'

"The Issue Ain't Monkey It's..."

I have a friend who tells me that his libido is below average except when he travels. Ordinarily he's tame as a neutered cat; but when he's on the road for work or vacation, he says all he can think about is sex. I asked him how big the gap was and he stretched out his arms. I kind of take his word for it.

He says he turns into one of those fiends that just stares at the rear of stewardesses as they lean over and serve drinks and wonders what kind of underwear they're wearing. He says by the time he checks into the hotel and crashes on the bed with jet-lag, all he wants to do is score with a hooker. I've often listened to his stories of risky encounters in foreign cities and wondered how the hell they really go - if they're as 'rewarding' as he makes them out to be.

I imagine that that being removed from the structure of his everyday life feeds into this sudden surge of testosterone he experiences, but other than that, I'm short of an explanation as to why the testosterone flows in such a manner.  Everybody is different.

I myself am indifferent to travel. The charms of foreign places, cultures artefacts and people are lost on me. If the language is not English or Japanese I can't really cope with the sound of foreign tongues on the TV. A place like Italy is fascinating with its history and art but it is off-set by just how lousy getting around can be. I'm probably one of those joyless assholes that don't like the south of France. Getting horny on the road is about as appealing as losing a passport on the road.

Anyway, my friend gets a giggle out of the Frank Zappa routine where the Russian Concierge tells Frank's band members they can't bring a hooker into the prestigious hotel. As such I thought it might be fun to at least riff on that with the lyrics.



Come join the fun at Spotify.